I have always believed that writing
advertisements is the second most profitable form of writing. The first,
of course, is ransom notes...
If you think advertising doesn't work,
consider the millions of Americans that now think yogurt tastes good.
In general, my children refused to eat
anything that hadn't danced on TV.
B. Earl Puckett
It is our job to make women unhappy
with what they have.
Half the money I spend on advertising is
wasted; the trouble is I don't know which half.
What is the difference between unethical
and ethical advertising? Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to
deceive the public; ethical advertising uses truth to deceive the
It is difficult to produce a television
documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes
one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.
Advertising is the rattling of a stick
inside a swill bucket.
I have... had a disturbing dream in which I
break through a cave wall near Nag Hammadi and discover urns full of
ancient Coptic scrolls. As I unfurl the first scroll, a subscription
card to some Gnostic exercise magazine flutters out.
People can have it in any color – so long
as it's black.